3.20.2006

An interlude

Cross-posted at Bring It On

Here is an anecdote that I related to two fellow bloggers this weekend in emails. Once to Miz Bohemia, who was expressing her frustration at circumcision as an entrenched default, and again to Pia, in regards to the perpetuity of backlash between generations. If there's any truth to the accusation that I tend to reuse bits of conversation it is due to the fact that I tend to see nearly all problems as being analogous.

Three monkeys were placed in a cage, by scientists. As soon as they were done not seeing, hearing, or speaking evil respectively, they were made the subject of experiment. A banana was put in the cage with them. Naturally, the monkeys went for the banana. They were subsequently doused in cold water. They shivered for a bit, dried themselves, thought, "what the bloody fuck was that?" and then went for the banana again, only to once again be left wet, shivering, and unfed. The process was repeated until none of the monkeys even had it in them to make for the banana. They had come to the conclusion that they'd rather be dry and warm and hungry than wet and cold as hungry. Having been observed to have come to that conclusion, Monkey one was removed, and monkey 4, who hadn't seen the goings on, was brought in. He naturally went for the banana. The other two monkeys stopped him. One can only imagine what was going through that poor little bugger's head. All of a sudden, there are two douchebags saying he couldn't have a banana. There was a bit of a scrap, and eventually, monkey 4 gave up, and decided, in a similar manner as the others, that it was better to be hungry and not beaten up and exhausted. At this point, monkey 2 was removed, and monkey 5, under a same condition of ignorance, was introduced. He too went for the banana, and was subdued by monkeys 3 and 4. When he stopped struggling, monkey 3 was swapped out for monkey 6. Like all the others did at first glance, he made for the banana. And monkeys 4 and 5, who had no idea why they weren't allowed to have the banana, restrained monkey 6. The reason? "That's how we do things around here."

We've evolved signifigantly from monkeys, but there are still some striking similarities in portions of our species, and it's a refrain of mine, but my guess is that if Intelligent Design held any merit and the reason the "missing link" hasn't been found in the fossil record is because some "intelligent designer" had crafted early hominids out of a great ape's blueprint, this flaw would have been removed somewhere along the way.

It is also, I believe, that very tendancy that causes a word that means "open minded" to be used as a slur by many, and prevents many people from refuting that use.

Speaking of unevolved automotons, it looks like Tom Cruise got his way... or did he?

There was a rumor circulating that Cruise wouldn't promote Mission: Impossible 3 if Paramount, the parent company of Comedy Central, reran the Scientology episode of South Park this past Wednesday. It didn't re-run. When asked why this happened a Comedy Central exec didn't give an answer, save to say that there was a new episode due this week and "we'll see what happens."

Which makes me expect the next episode to be a Parthian Shot.

I love the phrase, "Parthian Shot." I especially love defining it. It refers to the cavalry archers of Parthia, who would, when faced against overwhelming odds, turn their horses and flee. After a short pursuit, they would shoot their bows over their shoulders. Those foolish enough to pursue died in a hail of arrows.

Evolution in action. Gotta love it

2 comments:

  1. I know a lot of "monkey's" that would still go after that banana. Great post!

    Love the way you break things down to the point...

    Also... Tom Cruise lost it a LONG time ago... CRAZY!!!

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  2. Tom Cruise is a nutjob and a half.... I am so glad I never liked the freak... Katie Holmes is a bigger freak I am afraid!

    The monkeys are still whining and crying over our calling circumcision barbaric... they claim we infered that they are barbarians... speaking of unevolved automatons...

    Somebody shoot me!!!!

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