5.04.2005

Not happening... not happening

I've got a sore throat, a fever, and a headache. This correspondance will be short, and my apologies if I didn't comment on your blog. Mike('s America), if you're reading this, then I had a lengthy rebuttal for your last post that I was going to issue here, but it as well as my work on the play and short story I really ought to be writing now have been cut short by feeling of utter crappiness. I apologize if I never get around to writing it, as I think you'd have enjoyed firing back.

All of you (or most of you) will be glad to know that Saije emailed me and will try to make with the blogging this weekend. She's been busy with her work on Books For Soldiers.

I think that's it. Well, even if that isn't "it," that's all I'm going to write, excluding this last sentance and the one word after it.

Peace

27 comments:

  1. I hope you feel better soon my dear Essy. I would send you chicken soup but it would get cold. And it makes the box soggy, which upsets the post office workers.

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  2. Kate, what I think he really needs is round the clock nursing, from a horny girl from Denver who needs to get away from her parents.

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  3. Thanks for the thought, KatieKate. I'm just about to step out and get myself some Advil (the one thing that I haven't quite mastered yet about living alone is keeping stocked of that sorta stuff)

    And Mike, I can't think of a single flaw in your logic.

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  4. The only problem with MikeyPants' plan is that, much like chicken soup, they don't ship well. And tend to need chiropractors once you take them out of the box.

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  5. Heh. I'm picturing that scene from the Great Muppet Caper. I see the cargo room with a box marked SuperKate. An attendant comes in.

    "We're just coming in over Chicago."
    "So the plane's about to land?"
    "The plane doesn't land in Chicago, it lands in LA. You land in Chicago."

    Then you're thrown out with a chute and you land in either Lake Michigan or the Chicago River, much to the surprise of everyone looking on.

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  6. I am sending your feel better vibes!

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  7. how would you feel about a horny girl from california, who now resides in denver b/c she had to run away (wasn't technically screaming but generally the same idea) from her loving friends and family? yeah, i come complete with issues.

    i hope you feel better :0)

    btw i love that you referenced the muppets. perhaps we actually could be somewhat compatible. ;0)

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  8. shame man. hope you feel better soon. i'd fax you some chicken soup, but the fax machine is still fucked from the last time i tried that.

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  9. DD: I like the way you think. Perhaps next time try scanning it.

    Essy: I'd prefer the lake, if you don't mind. Would I have to perform a song and dance upon leaving the box, or would there be some recovery time?

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  10. Beaky: You had me at "horny girl." I mean I've had about the equivalent of two dates out here. One time I thought we were on a date and she didn't, another she thought we were on a date and I didn't. That being said, I wouldn't consider, "horny girl who likes the Muppets" to be something to merely "settle for." It's more than welcome. My friends tell me that I prolly quote the original Muppet Movie more than any other living being. Not sure if I buy it, but you get the point.

    Double-d: That happens with yours too?

    SuperKatieKate: If my memory serves me correctly, the next musical number was "Welcome Home to the Happiness Hotel," and the Muppets just threw in a bar or two. What I'm saying is that the first song would be on me.

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  11. oh and just to be clear: by "something" I meant the horniness and the affinity for Muppets

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  12. If Beaky does come to Chicago, she can stop by here in Nebraska for a night of warm up sex, so she doesn't explode all over you from her pent up frustration.

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  13. so what, I can't handle an explosion? I do believe I've just been challenged to a man-off

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  14. ok, so what we need are twin Beakys who haven't had any sexual release for a year. We can then see who can survive her explosion.

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  15. well that would defeat the purpose of it all, wouldn't it?

    No, I think that the terms of this contest need to be set by an impartial observer.

    Or we could just not set any terms and one-up each other in comment posts.

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  16. first off, what is a man off? i get the general idea, but i've never heard it put that way.

    next i don't have a twin... that i know of, so that's right out.

    and finally it hasn't been that long since i've had sex, it just feels like it, so i don't think i'll be exploding. but thanks for your concern ;0P*.

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  17. Well, since Beaky is obviously willing, but doesn't have a twin, what we should do is have her visit me for a week of sexual excess and success, then have another dry spell, equal to the one she is on, before visiting the Wombat. That way, it can all be solved, and eventually Beaky will be able to walk normal again.

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  18. Beaky: I suppose another way of wording it is a dick contest, though not in the literal sense. I'm guessing that that wouldn't be fair to Mike ;) I actually haven't heard it put that way, either. I invent phrases from time to time.

    Mike: Listen to yourself. You're talking about a self-inflicted dry spell. Would you purposely deny yourself so that two people you've only "known" online for under a month can settle a score? If say, Katie and Beaky were having some sort of a contest... ok, bad example. But you get my point.

    I restate the above. If we're going to do this, some third party is going to have to set the terms.

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  19. Well, in that case, I nominate Kate to settle it, cuz I think she wants us all to get laid so we can shut up about it and work on finding her the perfect penis.

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  20. We are in concordance there, but I can't say much for my penis-finding abilities. I know where mine is, but that's about it.

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  21. I'm back...and now you're sick? Oh, well guess I'll just spend time catching up on all your posts.

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  22. Of course I want us all to get laid. But shutting up about it was never part of the plan. You know how people talk about people who kiss and tell. That's me. They're talking about me.

    As for the perfect penis, really at this point any penis will do. So long as it doesn't reek of smegma and isn't oozing disease.

    I do have some standards.

    I haven't been laid for so long, I'm nearly revirginated. If you set a naked boy in front of me I probably wouldn't have the slightest clue what to do with him. I'd probably end up poking him in the forehead and running away giggling as that is my favorite thing to do these days, just ask Beaky.

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  23. it's true. that is her new favorite thing to do...at least to me :(. *sigh*

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  24. well, thats at least marginally better than her, say, dry-humping your leg and running away giggling

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  25. That could be fun! Thanks for the idea, Essy! Heh heh heh...

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  26. for my fee as a gag writer I demand a video clip

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  27. Can I get a copy of that?

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